Humour (48)

CLEAN Jokes

Ordering a Pizza in 2022

CALLER:

Is this Pizza Hut?

GOOGLE:

No sir, it's Google Pizza.

CALLER:

I must have dialed a wrong number, sorry.

GOOGLE:

No sir, Google bought Pizza Hut last month.

CALLER:

OK. I would like to order a pizza.

GOOGLE:

Do you want your usual

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158 Replies · Reply by Driza May 6, 2023
Views: 1937

Jokes Section - ADULTS ONLY

A man asks the aged Reverend what are the chances he’ll get to heaven when he dies, and the Reverend says that there is a good chance but first he’ll have to clean up his life, i.e. no smoking, no booze and certainly no he should control

his apparent

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86 Replies · Reply by Tad Feb 17, 2023
Views: 1517

ADVICE NEEDED!

 

 Someone I know is looking to buy a puppy. He has a young family and lives in Sydney's western suburbs. He has a medium-sized yard. I have only ever had English Staffies and I don't think a Staffy puppy would suit this situation. 

 If anyone knows

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31 Replies · Reply by Randy Handlinger Feb 13, 2022
Views: 711
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Latest comments

Michael W. replied to Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin's discussion Signing predictions !
"I remember when we signed Pezet, one of the journos on NRL360 quizzed Anasta on how much we paid for Pezet, Anasta said we got him ridiculously cheap, my guess is $300 - $350k."
14 minutes ago
Poppa replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Some of the points made sit in a bin of self justification....
R&R sits with who again? 
Now Russell looked really good last year and we were all disappointed to lose him to Perth, that doesn't stop the current judgements, but it is handy.
Will…"
15 minutes ago
Poppa replied to Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin's discussion Signing predictions !
"I do not believe we would be paying 400k for Pezet.....it was said at the time it was rediculously cheap, my guess 250?
and yes it is a guess because no one other than those that "count" will know the truth, especially not the garbage journalists…"
35 minutes ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"two players the Eels have spent years & money retaining & developing into the 'worst centre pairing....hmmm, perhaps not the flex Daz thought it was...he is determined to defend the status quo in head office...just like Hoe
I got a "Mod note" for…"
57 minutes ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Parra fan on The Hill's discussion Abdo Gonski
"Yeah he did...Cupping Vlandys nuts everyday isn't that confusing"
1 hour ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Parra fan on The Hill's discussion Abdo Gonski
"I like PVL for his innovation...I can't even LB....you do realise that it is Ugly Petes fucking "innovative innovation tinkering" that have made the game so damn....wait....you know this....what the hell dude"
1 hour ago
LB replied to Parra fan on The Hill's discussion Abdo Gonski
"No mention of a poll, he was saying from contacts he has that work for the NRL. He would have people he knows personally that he talks to."
2 hours ago
Coryn Hughes replied to Angry Eel's discussion Hypothetical Question
"I think something that isn't mentioned is momentum swings these 2 players can swing momentum with there involvement alone they also free up other players also with the attention they no doubt garner.
These mentioned things can be had in attack or…"
2 hours ago
Nightmare Off-Season replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"So Daz, your attack on posters with criticisms of R&R is identifying quite a few Eels players - who have been recruited or retained by the Eels - as amongst the worst in the league for contribution to their team?
And your closing statement is by…"
2 hours ago
Nightmare Off-Season replied to Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin's discussion Signing predictions !
"I see it very similar to you, LB.
When you have a roster hole that needs filling, you fill it with the best available player you can - of course with due diligence on them as a player / person.
Not big on blocking paths for juniors unless they are…"
2 hours ago
Coryn Hughes replied to Angry Eel's discussion Hypothetical Question
"When do you think the last time Foran played a full nrl season Pops without injury ? Vs how many seasons he had and playing those 300 games.Foran I agree had issues off the park but his body was shot when he got to us just having a look back at his…"
3 hours ago
Poupou Escobar replied to Angry Eel's discussion Hypothetical Question
"Foran played 162 NRL games AFTER HE LEFT THE EELS. Add that to the 147 he played in his first stint at Manly and the 9 games he played for us, Foran played over 300 NRL games. Hardly a player with "problems". Most likely is that he got the fuck out…"
8 hours ago
Hell On Eels replied to Parra fan on The Hill's discussion Abdo Gonski
"Daz, that’s a fascinating point. I listened to Kent’s podcast after your post.
Kent claims around half the RLPA poll respondents were senior players with 8+ years experience (over 200 seasons of experience) and their concerns included:

the game…"
9 hours ago
Prof. Daz replied to Angry Eel's discussion Hypothetical Question
"Well, how many half chances that the Eels have left out there would have been converted with Hayne and Semi? The Eels rank 11th for converting a normal set into a try. If there are set restarts? The Eels drop to 15th for scoring a try after a set…"
9 hours ago
Prof. Daz replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"The Rugby League Eye Test released its mid-season report todasy and calculated Top and Bottom 20 players for player contribtion.
In the Bottom 20 list, Penisini sits . . . 3rd (worst). Luckily the resident 1Eyedeel Recruitment & Retention Experts…"
10 hours ago
Prof. Daz replied to Parra fan on The Hill's discussion Abdo Gonski
"LB, is the poll  mentioned by Kent the one conducted by the RLPA? Where they 'reported' that 50% of the players no longer enjoy the game as much as they once did and 80% think the refs decide matches?
I would put almost zero confidence in those…"
10 hours ago
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