Jokes Section - ADULTS ONLY

A man asks the aged Reverend what are the chances he’ll get to heaven when he dies, and the Reverend says that there is a good chance but first he’ll have to clean up his life, i.e. no smoking, no booze and certainly no he should control

his apparent out of control sexual urge . So the man thought he’d at least give it a try and all went well for a few days, but then….. ‘T’raaaaan’…. there was his wife bent U shape right in the freezer, and he couldn’t help tearing off her bloomers and giving her a doggy turn. He felt guilty about it afterwards and called back in and told the Reverend .The aged Reverend said, “Don’t worry my son, one now and then won’t hurt your future in heaven.” To which the man replied, “Oh thank goodness for that, that’s great news ‘cause now we’re both banned from Harvey Norman Stores "

 

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • I liked it Driza

  • Haha Driza.

    Poppa Don,t get any ideas from this.It's not okay to do this stuff at Harvey Normans or even the Goodguys

  • Ha Poppa and Tad you both like it because it sounds like your fantasy . Best to shop after hours if you are planning this and seriously a warning do not attempt this on Black Friday or Boxing Day sale days. 

    • Haha Driza I think Pops is having second thoughts about even shopping after-hours quiet times these days. probably the fantasy stuff is safest

      10898594891?profile=RESIZE_180x180

      • Pops is currently in Bali inspecting future hotels that dont have escalators, that one there you have of me I can't even remember getting up, but I must have because I have had 3 massages in two days and it hasn't been a problem at all.

        • Haha enjoy your trip Pops  Watch out for the Greenies as well.

        • No doubt the bali sex crimes unit is on high alert and have officers watching you at all times pops lol?

          How much you bribing them with this time?

          • there is no sex crimes in Bali snakey, they have just banned sex unless your married..... luckily i qualify one way or another LOL

        • Well Tad  I think Pops can give up hope of ever being an Olympic gymnast , or is it just his perennial alcohol consumption issue ? 

          • I once did a double roll with a tuck Driza, the only problem is i didn't realise you were supposed to eat it!

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

Angry Eel replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Hail Mary decision I'd say"
1 hour ago
Angry Eel replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Why the fuck did Olokuatu get benched for Lucas? Olokuatu was one of our most damaging in game 1. What an embarrassing selection tbh"
1 hour ago
Poupou Escobar replied to Prof. Daz's discussion Disclosure Day
"I'm not the one looking for certainty or evidence, HOE. I'm not the sceptic here. What if a million people said they'd seen the Queen of Mars' dragon army, but offered no other proof? What if it was a billion?"
3 hours ago
Poupou Escobar replied to Prof. Daz's discussion Disclosure Day
"Straight to the appeal to authority Daz? Don't let Descartes do your thinking for you. He is dead."
3 hours ago
Joeyboyz replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Yes. I can't stand Slater, but he is way better than Daley."
3 hours ago
Poupou Escobar replied to Prof. Daz's discussion Disclosure Day
"The spiritual beings in these books are certainly capable of taking physical form."
3 hours ago
Strange-eel replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Anyone know why Moses came off?"
3 hours ago
Y2Eel replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Yep..
Robson should have gone off with 15 to go in the first half.
AFB getting 8 minutes....
Teddy bar the miracle try in game 1 has been average.
Drops the inform second rower after 1 game..
Radley why...."
3 hours ago
Blaze replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Listen laurie you twat, if you want to win the series pick this team for game 3!
1. Turbo
2. Kiraz
3.Latrel
4.Chrichton
5. Nawaqnatsay
6. Mosses
7. Cleary
8. Haas
9. Korisau
10. Afb
11. Olokauto
12. Martin
13. Murray
 
14. Brailey
15. Barnet
16.…"
4 hours ago
Stevo replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Yep"
4 hours ago
fake midget pseudoachondroplasia replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"When NSW were winning field position we forced errors and scored but then Cleary started taking over doing more kicks in 2nd half and Qld started dominating the field position and Moses went off.  What are the chances he is hurt again.
Cleary once…"
5 hours ago
TolEllts replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Sack Laurie. Does not have any counter to QLD's attack. Radley, Staggs, Lucas and maybe Tedesco should be replaced. Api should have been put in. I don't know why Oualokauto was removed. "
5 hours ago
Gaz Nelson replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Yeh he's been having a shocker as Blues coach. I don't blame Lozza though, he's a passionate blues man and a great footballer in his day. But what are the people running the show thinking? His last stint as coach wasn't enough? Last year was down to…"
5 hours ago
Bear replied to fake midget pseudoachondroplasia's discussion Is Daley worse Origin coach ever?
"Laurie couldn't coach water out of a tap. At 24-12 we were a chance if he used his bench correctly, Strange on for Staggs, Appi on for Robson, we were tired without punch, both those players would have lifted us. Tragic"
5 hours ago
fake midget pseudoachondroplasia commented on Electric Eel 2’s status
"Just logged on to see people thoughs about origin and surprised as well, but with Daley as coach Origin is pretty uninspiring.
It's like watching Parra under BA just wondering how the hell will they score points and hoping the opposition don't go…"
5 hours ago
Darren Munro replied to Trev's discussion U19 origin
"Just noticed 
Koina vs talagi "
5 hours ago
More…

 

Disclosure Day

What would you think if definitive proof of alien life emerged? Would it consign all religious thought to, as Mark Twain once predicted, the fate of a stuffed ornament in museums? How would suggestive confirmation of the principles of uniformity and…

Read more…
115 Replies · Reply by Poupou Escobar 3 hours ago
Views: 1082

U19 origin

Looks like bamblett has been called in to the blues side at 18 man with Rex falling out and possibly will be named to start come game day. We now have 4 players in the squads in Bamblett, Petrus, Ryda and Koina. Is this our best rookie class in a…

Read more…
29 Replies · Reply by Darren Munro 5 hours ago
Views: 1160

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>