Did you hear about the Queensland Eels supporter who tied a hand grenade to his testicals? He said, anyone who kicks him in the balls is going to get a shock!
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How is it attached? Twine, Velcro or trip wire?
Is it worn under the clothing or on the outside?
Ok, maybe it's a trip wire between the knees that sets off a stun grenade. Am I close?
Among leaves beside a stream.The hot, dry fly said to no one in particular, 'Gosh...if I go down five inches I will feel the mist from the water And I will be refreshed.' There was a fish in the water thinking, 'Gosh...if that fly goes down five inches,
I can eat him.' There was a bear on the shore thinking, 'Gosh....if that fly goes down five inches That fish will jump for the fly... And I will grab the fish!!' It also happened that a hunter was farther
Up the bank of the lake, preparing to eat a
Cheese sandwich.... 'Gosh,' he thought, 'if that fly goes down
Five inches, and that fish leaps for it, that
Bear will expose himself and grab for the
Fish. I'll shoot the bear and have a proper
Lunch.' Now, you probably think this is enough
Activity on one river bank, but I can tell
You there's more.... A wee mouse by the hunter's foot was
Thinking,'Gosh, if that fly goes down five inches, And that fish jumps for that fly, And that bear grabs for that fish, The dumb hunter will shoot the bear And drop his cheese sandwich.' A cat lurking in the bushes took in this scene
And thought, (as was fashionable to do on the
Banks of this particular river around lunch time) 'Gosh, if that fly goes down five inches, And that fish jumps for that fly, And that bear grabs for that fish, And that hunter shoots that bear, And that mouse makes off with the
Cheese sandwich, Then I can have mouse for lunch.' The poor fly is finally so hot and so dry that he Heads down for the cooling mist of the water. The fish swallows the fly, The bear grabs the fish, The hunter shoots the bear, The mouse grabs the cheese sandwich, The cat jumps for the mouse, The mouse ducks, The cat falls into the water and drowns. NOW, The Moral Of The Story.... Whenever a fly goes down five inches,
Some pussy's gonna be in serious danger.
There is a metaphor in every thing. A very good cautionary tail.