Random Thoughts

You come from dust and to dust you will return. That's why you shouldn't dust. It could be someone you know.

When one door closes and another door opens, you're probably in prison.

If you answer your phone with "Hello. You're on the air.", most telemarketers will quickly hang up.

Sometimes, someone unexpected comes into your life from nowhere. It makes your heart race and changes you forever.  We call these people cops.

For Sale . Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

They say marriages are made in Heaven. Then again, so is lightning and thunder.

Maybe the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of Charades.

This "killing them with kindness" is taking way longer than I expected.

I started out with nothing. I still have most of it.

There's nothing scarier than that split second when you lose your balance in the shower and think "Oh No. They're gonna find me naked.”

One minute you're young and fun. And the next you're turning down the stereo in your car so you can see better.

One day you'll be able to tell your grandkids that you survived the GTPS 2020 (Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020).

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.

Never miss a good chance to shut up. 

And finally - Can we all agree that in 2015 not a single person got the answer correct to the question, "Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?"

 

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Replies

    • Tad : Where do the flies go in Winter? Sparrow Fart does not exist anymore!

      • Robert---when a bird flies his wings go up and down.When his wings go down his body naturally goes up That .Makes sense. When his wings go up why doesn,t his body go down?

        • Surely it's a matter of perspective....

  • I just had a Random thought, it was so random it wandered away before I could thnk of it.

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          • Thanks Slugg You have inspired me Mate Have been thinking about doing  a blog on Impignorate. Yes it is a real word 

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Latest comments

Hell On Eels replied to Hell On Eels's discussion The Eels v Lomax: Timeline and Key Questions
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Clintorian replied to Hell On Eels's discussion The Eels v Lomax: Timeline and Key Questions
"They should be shitting themselves, they thought they could just walk all over us and we wouldn't do anything about it, dodgy cunts."
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1 hour ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Hell On Eels's discussion The Eels v Lomax: Timeline and Key Questions
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1 hour ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Hell On Eels's discussion The Eels v Lomax: Timeline and Key Questions
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Pato replied to Hell On Eels's discussion The Eels v Lomax: Timeline and Key Questions
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