The Woke Olympics thread

I must say to date these Olympics have been the most enjoyable Olympics of all for me , I'm watchig with great anticipation to find out who will be the wokest of the wokest and catapult their careers the furthest into the shitpile in a great show of self sacrifice for their cause .

Here are some of the front runners so far ,

* Will it be our woke victim darling of and newly discovered black Klan representative Lizzy the Grand Wizzy Cambridge ? Who made the bold move of peaking pre Olympics and setting the bar high ? Lizzy challenged all to chase her without even hoping on a plane . Very experienced campaigner who not only came out of the blocks with a burst of speed but one upped her game with the addition of a mental health card . Will be hard to beat paying $3 for the win .

* Secondly we have the U.S woman's soccer team . Regarded as the number 1 woman's team in the world , the team of all teams and led by the non binary, same sex , chose your gender at ages 5 , progressive household , 2020s version of David Beckham . If privilege was measured as a toxic males appendage, this team has been on a Johnny Holmes and Dirk Diggler spit roast. Hopefully the Swedes wore frangas on those strap ons as that was a nasty bukake . Paying $1.75 for the win .

* Or will it be our other home grown heroins The Matildas ? The bunch who've grown up being privileged with the use of many scholarships for sports high schools , ellite institutes of sport , a dirth of Facebook likes and praise to boost their skills and one of the strongest women's comps in the world to learn their trade in ?
A team that was fortunate enough to narrowly beat the lowly ranked New Zealanders, a team that are still training in Dunlop Volleys so they don't wear their game day boots out , a team that waters down their Gatorade to make it last longer , and drinks Aldi brand NesQuick out of a Milo tin as real Milo will blow their tampon budget . In a predictable yet effective move the Matiladas dragged out the Cathy Freeman strategy of the Indigenous flag to further their media attention . Shortened up from $7 to $2.25 for the win .

"'This place' matters far less than what happens on the field. I suspect it wouldn't have been good for us if Lomax had stayed and kicked stones while chewing up ~8% of our cap. We are far better off with good culture than more talent, if it meant…"

"Lomax was replaced by Simonsson, who would probably have left otherwise. We use Lomax's money to sign a replacement for Simonsson and spend the difference elsewhere in the roster."

"It's good therapy, Clayton. A community service, so to speak. Better here than at home. No sane wife would put up with too much Poo Bombing (or maybe too much Unicorn lol). And they'd lock all the doghouses too not just the doors and windows. LOL. "

Replies

Wizardssleeves official receipts July 22, 2021 at 12:28pm

Cant seem to edit , super can you put this in social threads please .
MeelK July 22, 2021 at 12:32pm

lol

I've started the stop watch. Let's see how long this one lasts...
MeelK July 22, 2021 at 12:34pm

How long will it be before the mens and womens versions of sports are no longer called mens and womens versions? We should come up with some names as replacements.
Muttman July 22, 2021 at 12:35pm

In the woke stakes, the US Women's Soccer team is a very clear favourite.
My Bob July 22, 2021 at 12:36pm

Well without trying to offend our female members here, but being 100% honest, if Eleven of the best 15 year old boys soccer players in Aus had suddenly identified as females, they would romp in the gold medal at the Olympics womens soccer.
Will 5150 July 22, 2021 at 1:11pm

Great blog Wiz... very important in a social justice sense that we acknowledge the fine work being done by the woke community to completely ruin the sporting world and life in general with their poorly argued, void of fact, hypocritical, constantly changeable, nonsensical, anti-everything, made up on the fly, agenda driven... sorry, I mean 'just'... causes.
Snakey - Sack Dylan Brown July 22, 2021 at 1:15pm

99% of this bullshit is coming from entitled imbecilic female athletes, this is what happens when you let women into sport, it will happen in RL for sure.

The grandstanding and disgraceful carry on from some of our female athletes and female athletes all over the world is completely out of hand.

Good blog Wiz, this topic has me absolutely fuming.
- Daz Sul > Snakey - Sack Dylan Brown August 14, 2021 at 8:54pm
  
  when i see teams taking a knee, I have an overwhelming impulse to push them all over cow tipping style
Wizardssleeves official receipts July 22, 2021 at 1:24pm

Now I know it's only a pipe dream , but how funny would it be if one of them pulled a hamstring getting up and has to be substituted before a ball was kicked .
- Poppa > Wizardssleeves official receipts July 22, 2021 at 1:51pm
  
  The Lord moves in mysterise ways Wiz......cannot help but notice referees and lineswokes are also bending the knee, is that not an obvious sign of bias?
  
  PS having never played with a vagina (no pun) it may be that these delicate tissues need to be stetched before any activities commence.....we may have to ask one of our site experts from the woke side to answer that?
  
  Those markings on the field also look a bit cultish to me!
  
  To be fair though, they haven't got to the level of the mens game!