Joke of the week

Man and he wife sitting watching tv then Lady go oh my God i pain in the belly she goes again oh my God i got a pain in the belly 

Husband say to the dr there is a new dr just two house down from here go to see him and tell them you in pain

So she does then about half hour later she come back slammed the door and throws her self down

And her husband say did you get bad news

She said NO i didnt the dr told me to take off all my clothes off lay down on the table with my legs open 

He was looking between my legs and said gee that looks nice i like to full that up with ice-cream and lick it all up so i jumped up and got dressed come home

The husband said.. DID HE SAY THAT THE DIRTY CUNT WILL IM GOING TO SEE HIM ABOUT THAT

as he walk to the door he stop and thinking for a sec and then he walk back and sat down next to hes wife she looked at at him and said

I throught you were going to see the dr

The husband said ye i was but any man can eat that much ice-cream is to big for me

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • This reply was deleted.
    • I love that joke. I have been saying for 20 years it never got popular but always gets a laugh.

  • Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

    "Grandma, that sounds easy but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?

    “What... You're coming empty handed

    • The worst joke I've ever heard 

      • You needed to understand Arnie Colin, Arnie was slightly challenged but had a wonderful self depracating sense of humour, a bit like Wiz asking his wife for an extra 50 under the curtain in the massage parlour......true story!

        • O K poppa but still the worst joke .one of the best I thought was the bloke not wanting to go in the army and got under what he thought was the nuns dress .

          • Yes, forgot about that one!.....Arnie probably does not have classic's as much as being so bad that you cannot help but laugh! Lol

      • maybe something to your taste Colin

        10892673675?profile=RESIZE_584x

        • 10892673495?profile=RESIZE_710x

  • https://youtube.com/shorts/w7Q5x6W0VVg?feature=share

    There's a million of these ...

     

     

  • This is one of my all time favourites 

     

     Danny cannot make his wife orgasm, so he goes to the doctor for some advice...

    He goes to the doctor and says, "Look, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm in bed, it's a real problem."

    The doctor says, "Well, is it too warm?"

    "Yes, it's absolutely sweltering"

    "Then get an air conditioner"

    "I can't afford air conditioner doc, I'm too poor"

    "Well, Danny, do you have a good friend, I mean a real close friend?"

    "Yeah, I've got a close friend, Frank"

    "Well, ask your friend Frank to stand over you and your wife with a towel, wafting you both to cool you down, that might help."

    So, Danny asks Frank for this favor, who then agrees to help him. That night, Danny is in bed with his wife, pounding away with Frank fanning them with the towel but it's doing nothing for her.

    Danny says, "Well this isn't working, let's swap." So Danny takes the towel and starts wafting Frank, who is now making love to Danny's wife. Not long after, Danny's wife goes "Oooh... oh that's it, I'm about to cum, I'm going to cum!" And has the biggest squirt you've ever seen. 

    Frank and Danny's wife both look awkwardly at Danny , then a after a uncomfortable silence ,

    Danny shouts, triumphantly, "You see, Frank?! That's how you waft a fucking towel!"

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

Frankie Fong commented on Randy Handlinger’s status
"3rd world garbage strikes again, Australia is finished as we know it . "
9 minutes ago
Randy Handlinger commented on Randy Handlinger’s status
"Oh No!!!
fuck me"
23 minutes ago
Flow Basket replied to Blue Eel's discussion Have The Eels Re Signed Haze Dunster.
"He will take over from pezet if need be maybe joash could be on the outer after being blocked "
27 minutes ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"The Billy BadBud Centre of Goodness....excellent"
2 hours ago
Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin 🐐 replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"Happy Xmas to yourself and family aswell pop. Thx mate"
2 hours ago
Poppa replied to Blue Eel's discussion Have The Eels Re Signed Haze Dunster.
"Hey Frank, you could ave posted that on my blog..........."
2 hours ago
Poppa replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"Hey Randy, we may be able to get "Pottsville" to sponsor us on away trips.....win a trip, take a dip!"
2 hours ago
Poppa replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"I'm not sure that/such a debate will ever have a winner.....Views can be so polarised, I care not think about it as I could take both sides and lose both of them.
Have a Merry Xmas Chiefy to you and your family.....look forward to the upcoming…"
2 hours ago
Poppa replied to Poppa's discussion Poppa's Corner: Grassroots, Juniors, Development and Future Visions
"Thanks Bluey, to you and your family as well.....stay safe
You have been a "tour de force" this orf seezun, I can see Chairman of the R&R coming your way.....don't worry I will help with another inciteful blog LOL"
2 hours ago
Eli Stephens replied to Blue Eel's discussion Have The Eels Re Signed Haze Dunster.
"No one is signing Haze Dunster till 2030 😂😂😂"
3 hours ago
Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin 🐐 replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"Government funded @@"
4 hours ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"The Passive Smoke Centre Of Excellent Excellence"
4 hours ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"Yes I understand where you're coming from, but the blog started with the words "The James Hardie Centre of Excellence". It associates with everything after. just like Hardies wanted...indeed what they paid for. Well, here it is. this is it. It comes…"
4 hours ago
Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin 🐐 replied to Blue Eel's discussion Have The Eels Re Signed Haze Dunster.
"Its fake.  If anything even if they were going to give him an opportunity, they would give him a train and trial,  not a 5 year deal to a player who's had one of the worst knee injuries. 
How could anyone fall for this haha. . Cmon "
4 hours ago
Hell On Eels replied to Eelawarra's discussion THE BADGE CONNECTS US ALL
"Chiefy, agree mate. Great stuff. 150 different players together. Same time. Same place. Same badge. From U16's Harold Matthews to first grade. What more could we ask for? That is, if we really want unity & a club aligned."
4 hours ago
Frank The Tank replied to Blue Eel's discussion Have The Eels Re Signed Haze Dunster.
"If this is true, this club is more fucked than I originally thought."
5 hours ago
More…

ANY MORE SIGNINGS???

I've been frustrated recently about the work we have been doing in the open market. Jonah's alright for a year and JDB is solid but he's getting old. I feel we need more in the forwards and some a replacement outside back. All I have seen is links…

Read more…
0 Replies
Views: 78

 

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>