Joke of the week

Man and he wife sitting watching tv then Lady go oh my God i pain in the belly she goes again oh my God i got a pain in the belly 

Husband say to the dr there is a new dr just two house down from here go to see him and tell them you in pain

So she does then about half hour later she come back slammed the door and throws her self down

And her husband say did you get bad news

She said NO i didnt the dr told me to take off all my clothes off lay down on the table with my legs open 

He was looking between my legs and said gee that looks nice i like to full that up with ice-cream and lick it all up so i jumped up and got dressed come home

The husband said.. DID HE SAY THAT THE DIRTY CUNT WILL IM GOING TO SEE HIM ABOUT THAT

as he walk to the door he stop and thinking for a sec and then he walk back and sat down next to hes wife she looked at at him and said

I throught you were going to see the dr

The husband said ye i was but any man can eat that much ice-cream is to big for me

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • This reply was deleted.
    • I love that joke. I have been saying for 20 years it never got popular but always gets a laugh.

  • Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

    "Grandma, that sounds easy but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?

    “What... You're coming empty handed

    • The worst joke I've ever heard 

      • You needed to understand Arnie Colin, Arnie was slightly challenged but had a wonderful self depracating sense of humour, a bit like Wiz asking his wife for an extra 50 under the curtain in the massage parlour......true story!

        • O K poppa but still the worst joke .one of the best I thought was the bloke not wanting to go in the army and got under what he thought was the nuns dress .

          • Yes, forgot about that one!.....Arnie probably does not have classic's as much as being so bad that you cannot help but laugh! Lol

      • maybe something to your taste Colin

        10892673675?profile=RESIZE_584x

        • 10892673495?profile=RESIZE_710x

  • https://youtube.com/shorts/w7Q5x6W0VVg?feature=share

    There's a million of these ...

     

     

  • This is one of my all time favourites 

     

     Danny cannot make his wife orgasm, so he goes to the doctor for some advice...

    He goes to the doctor and says, "Look, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm in bed, it's a real problem."

    The doctor says, "Well, is it too warm?"

    "Yes, it's absolutely sweltering"

    "Then get an air conditioner"

    "I can't afford air conditioner doc, I'm too poor"

    "Well, Danny, do you have a good friend, I mean a real close friend?"

    "Yeah, I've got a close friend, Frank"

    "Well, ask your friend Frank to stand over you and your wife with a towel, wafting you both to cool you down, that might help."

    So, Danny asks Frank for this favor, who then agrees to help him. That night, Danny is in bed with his wife, pounding away with Frank fanning them with the towel but it's doing nothing for her.

    Danny says, "Well this isn't working, let's swap." So Danny takes the towel and starts wafting Frank, who is now making love to Danny's wife. Not long after, Danny's wife goes "Oooh... oh that's it, I'm about to cum, I'm going to cum!" And has the biggest squirt you've ever seen. 

    Frank and Danny's wife both look awkwardly at Danny , then a after a uncomfortable silence ,

    Danny shouts, triumphantly, "You see, Frank?! That's how you waft a fucking towel!"

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin 🐐 replied to Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin 🐐's discussion Club Statement
"Lol 😁 "
2 hours ago
Alfred Mateo replied to Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin 🐐's discussion Club Statement
"All the scrutiny on saints re their failing dads army recruitment strategy and the one old dude they release, we sign. In a results driven business, ONeill continues to deliver diddly squat yet somehow gets to keep his high paying job with seemingly…"
3 hours ago
Mannah-Brow replied to Eels2025's discussion Anyone else feel like this week against Tigers is make or break?
"More likely he is struggling to find the motivation to play behind such a pack of absolute plodders."
4 hours ago
LB replied to Eels2025's discussion Anyone else feel like this week against Tigers is make or break?
"It is not make or break but if we get done and Gold Coast beat us, then perhaps."
5 hours ago
LB replied to Eels2025's discussion Anyone else feel like this week against Tigers is make or break?
"Then again look at the opponents we have faced, tough opponents that will get him battered and bruised. "
5 hours ago
The Captain replied to Eels2025's discussion Anyone else feel like this week against Tigers is make or break?
"I don't remember a time when Moses hasn't been struggling with an injury in the last 3 years. Age is definitely catching up to him. I hope he manages to stay on the park this season."
5 hours ago
Parraboy replied to Eels2025's discussion Anyone else feel like this week against Tigers is make or break?
"The boys will bounce back. anyone hear Moses struggling with a injury & in some doubt?"
5 hours ago
JC replied to Eels2025's discussion Anyone else feel like this week against Tigers is make or break?
"It won't be make or break but it is a game where more fight needs to be shown. 
Our line speed and first contact is the worst in the comp and there is no excuse for that. This is basically the same squad as last season, particularly the forward pack…"
5 hours ago
LB replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 5 Team List v Wests Tigers
"Based on what? Not once last year did he get ragdolled playing Fullback."
6 hours ago
Strange-eel replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 5 Team List v Wests Tigers
"Yes"
6 hours ago
LB replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 5 Team List v Wests Tigers
"Depth players are depth players for a reason, when you start relying on them of course your team is average.
We have lost 2 top 17 forwards for the season, 2 Centres and a Fullback in the space of 2 weeks.
Our team is better, even if it is slightly…"
6 hours ago
Flow Basket replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 5 Team List v Wests Tigers
"If the wingers can catch the bombs we're in this"
6 hours ago
Graham polkinghorne replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 5 Team List v Wests Tigers
"I think Williams should be left side attacking between centre and winger. Pezet has a good long ball. I also think Teancum Brown needs to come off the bench. I think this will be a close game. Junior and Moses need to lead."
6 hours ago
Graham polkinghorne replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 5 Team List v Wests Tigers
"That's not gunna happen."
6 hours ago
The Captain replied to Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin 🐐's discussion Club Statement
"LOL. You absolute turd Chiefy! I almost had hope for a second there... 🤣🤣"
6 hours ago
Zip zip replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 5 Team List v Wests Tigers
"Agree. Would also like to see Apa get his chance. He's not exactly a kid, 22 yrs this year (?). If people are worried about his defence, I'm sure he'll fit right in with the rest of the team that has conceded close to 40 points a game so far. Start…"
7 hours ago
More…

Keaon done deal

As of Thursday, December 11, 2025, South Sydney Rabbitohs forwardKeaon Koloamatangi has reportedly agreed to a deal with the Parramatta Eels, but it is not yet officially announced by the clubs.  Soon to be announced.

Read more…
14 Replies · Reply by Poppa Jan 9
Views: 2264

 

An idea

Wondering last night and what people thought, imo walker is most effective off the bench, can we start ryley at 13 and talyn at 9 with walker on the bench, then you bring in walker to lock, ryley to 9 and talyn to the bench for a break?

Read more…
3 Replies · Reply by LB 16 hours ago
Views: 289

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>