Joke of the week

Man and he wife sitting watching tv then Lady go oh my God i pain in the belly she goes again oh my God i got a pain in the belly 

Husband say to the dr there is a new dr just two house down from here go to see him and tell them you in pain

So she does then about half hour later she come back slammed the door and throws her self down

And her husband say did you get bad news

She said NO i didnt the dr told me to take off all my clothes off lay down on the table with my legs open 

He was looking between my legs and said gee that looks nice i like to full that up with ice-cream and lick it all up so i jumped up and got dressed come home

The husband said.. DID HE SAY THAT THE DIRTY CUNT WILL IM GOING TO SEE HIM ABOUT THAT

as he walk to the door he stop and thinking for a sec and then he walk back and sat down next to hes wife she looked at at him and said

I throught you were going to see the dr

The husband said ye i was but any man can eat that much ice-cream is to big for me

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • This reply was deleted.
    • I love that joke. I have been saying for 20 years it never got popular but always gets a laugh.

  • Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

    "Grandma, that sounds easy but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?

    “What... You're coming empty handed

    • The worst joke I've ever heard 

      • You needed to understand Arnie Colin, Arnie was slightly challenged but had a wonderful self depracating sense of humour, a bit like Wiz asking his wife for an extra 50 under the curtain in the massage parlour......true story!

        • O K poppa but still the worst joke .one of the best I thought was the bloke not wanting to go in the army and got under what he thought was the nuns dress .

          • Yes, forgot about that one!.....Arnie probably does not have classic's as much as being so bad that you cannot help but laugh! Lol

      • maybe something to your taste Colin

        10892673675?profile=RESIZE_584x

        • 10892673495?profile=RESIZE_710x

  • https://youtube.com/shorts/w7Q5x6W0VVg?feature=share

    There's a million of these ...

     

     

  • This is one of my all time favourites 

     

     Danny cannot make his wife orgasm, so he goes to the doctor for some advice...

    He goes to the doctor and says, "Look, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm in bed, it's a real problem."

    The doctor says, "Well, is it too warm?"

    "Yes, it's absolutely sweltering"

    "Then get an air conditioner"

    "I can't afford air conditioner doc, I'm too poor"

    "Well, Danny, do you have a good friend, I mean a real close friend?"

    "Yeah, I've got a close friend, Frank"

    "Well, ask your friend Frank to stand over you and your wife with a towel, wafting you both to cool you down, that might help."

    So, Danny asks Frank for this favor, who then agrees to help him. That night, Danny is in bed with his wife, pounding away with Frank fanning them with the towel but it's doing nothing for her.

    Danny says, "Well this isn't working, let's swap." So Danny takes the towel and starts wafting Frank, who is now making love to Danny's wife. Not long after, Danny's wife goes "Oooh... oh that's it, I'm about to cum, I'm going to cum!" And has the biggest squirt you've ever seen. 

    Frank and Danny's wife both look awkwardly at Danny , then a after a uncomfortable silence ,

    Danny shouts, triumphantly, "You see, Frank?! That's how you waft a fucking towel!"

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

KENDOZA replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Just seen dogs looking at getting brimson from the titans and sam verrills. Meanwhile all you can hear is crickets out parra way."
14 minutes ago
Gucci replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Fake news, the other outlets wouldve jumped at this news already be posting on their Insta/ Facebook pages."
1 hour ago
Jack Eelson replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Honestly not fussed if true. Will doesn't have the speed to be a massive sucess at centre an his defence hasn't been the best. Will has tackle just ability and can make some meters every now and then. "
1 hour ago
Nightmare Off-Season replied to EA's discussion Junior Paulo Injury
"True, but having a genuine chance at competing for a premiership in your last 2 seasons in NRL would very likely appeal to Moses. He has achieved everything else, he is set up for life & then some, I have no doubt a Premiership means a lot to him.…"
2 hours ago
Clintorian replied to Parra fan on The Hill's discussion Jai Arrow - When life puts everything into perspective
"Tragic.
He would have had a great career in the media too, he was your typical footy meathead, but was weirdly articulate and pretty funny in front of the camera. "
2 hours ago
Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"I don't think the 27 five-eighth will come from within "
4 hours ago
Offside replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"I don't think its true but I think Will is at a point in his career where he needs to move as hes not progressing and a change of situation might restart his career"
4 hours ago
Yehez replied to EA's discussion Junior Paulo Injury
"I mean sure he can but even then he'll go somewhere else for 2 years? 
Winning GFs is not a guaranteed business. Plenty of great halves haven't won one. A lot haven't even played in one. "
5 hours ago
Yehez replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Doubt this is true. 
Also Warriors have signed Warbrick and Grant Anderson already for next year. They still have Dallin, Khan-Pereira, Pompey, Leiataua, Charnze, Tuaipiki............All in the back 5 for 2027. 
Why would they sign Will? Unless more…"
5 hours ago
Eels tragic replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Ill believe it when and if I see it.  Just like another guy on facebook saying that his sources have confirmed that Matt Burton agreed to terms with Parra a month ago and will be at the Eels next year.  
As I said I will believe it only if it…"
6 hours ago
Coryn Hughes replied to EA's discussion Junior Paulo Injury
"I'd say we have 2 more years of prime time Moses and then that's all she wrote.
Ive been saying it for awhile now at what point does Moses pull up sticks and say I've done everything I can here to his PA find me another club please."
8 hours ago
Coryn Hughes replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"2028 seems plausible because they have guys like Rocco Berry,RTS coming off at the end of this year Pompey CNK Leitaua are signed through the 27 season.They've just signed Grant Andersen and  Will Warbrick for next year so potentially there could be…"
8 hours ago
Titan replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Please don't tease me. Guarantee me that it's true"
13 hours ago
LB replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"He didn't have an option for 2028. He took it for 2026. He said himself he had agreed til 2028 late last year. Maybe something happened before signing. With the Centres on the market and having a battle between Nanva and Samrani, think we could be…"
13 hours ago
Mallee57 replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"Don't think so "
13 hours ago
Randy Handlinger replied to Adam Hayne's discussion Will Penisini Gone
"...but his sauces have confirmed!!!
 "
14 hours ago
More…

Keaon done deal

As of Thursday, December 11, 2025, South Sydney Rabbitohs forwardKeaon Koloamatangi has reportedly agreed to a deal with the Parramatta Eels, but it is not yet officially announced by the clubs.  Soon to be announced.

Read more…
14 Replies · Reply by Poppa Jan 9
Views: 2441

 

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>