Joke of the week

Man and he wife sitting watching tv then Lady go oh my God i pain in the belly she goes again oh my God i got a pain in the belly 

Husband say to the dr there is a new dr just two house down from here go to see him and tell them you in pain

So she does then about half hour later she come back slammed the door and throws her self down

And her husband say did you get bad news

She said NO i didnt the dr told me to take off all my clothes off lay down on the table with my legs open 

He was looking between my legs and said gee that looks nice i like to full that up with ice-cream and lick it all up so i jumped up and got dressed come home

The husband said.. DID HE SAY THAT THE DIRTY CUNT WILL IM GOING TO SEE HIM ABOUT THAT

as he walk to the door he stop and thinking for a sec and then he walk back and sat down next to hes wife she looked at at him and said

I throught you were going to see the dr

The husband said ye i was but any man can eat that much ice-cream is to big for me

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • This reply was deleted.
    • I love that joke. I have been saying for 20 years it never got popular but always gets a laugh.

  • Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

    "Grandma, that sounds easy but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?

    “What... You're coming empty handed

    • The worst joke I've ever heard 

      • You needed to understand Arnie Colin, Arnie was slightly challenged but had a wonderful self depracating sense of humour, a bit like Wiz asking his wife for an extra 50 under the curtain in the massage parlour......true story!

        • O K poppa but still the worst joke .one of the best I thought was the bloke not wanting to go in the army and got under what he thought was the nuns dress .

          • Yes, forgot about that one!.....Arnie probably does not have classic's as much as being so bad that you cannot help but laugh! Lol

      • maybe something to your taste Colin

        10892673675?profile=RESIZE_584x

        • 10892673495?profile=RESIZE_710x

  • https://youtube.com/shorts/w7Q5x6W0VVg?feature=share

    There's a million of these ...

     

     

  • This is one of my all time favourites 

     

     Danny cannot make his wife orgasm, so he goes to the doctor for some advice...

    He goes to the doctor and says, "Look, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm in bed, it's a real problem."

    The doctor says, "Well, is it too warm?"

    "Yes, it's absolutely sweltering"

    "Then get an air conditioner"

    "I can't afford air conditioner doc, I'm too poor"

    "Well, Danny, do you have a good friend, I mean a real close friend?"

    "Yeah, I've got a close friend, Frank"

    "Well, ask your friend Frank to stand over you and your wife with a towel, wafting you both to cool you down, that might help."

    So, Danny asks Frank for this favor, who then agrees to help him. That night, Danny is in bed with his wife, pounding away with Frank fanning them with the towel but it's doing nothing for her.

    Danny says, "Well this isn't working, let's swap." So Danny takes the towel and starts wafting Frank, who is now making love to Danny's wife. Not long after, Danny's wife goes "Oooh... oh that's it, I'm about to cum, I'm going to cum!" And has the biggest squirt you've ever seen. 

    Frank and Danny's wife both look awkwardly at Danny , then a after a uncomfortable silence ,

    Danny shouts, triumphantly, "You see, Frank?! That's how you waft a fucking towel!"

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Yea with his age we shall see. Same response to what I said to Pou"
7 minutes ago
EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Not sure how you didn't rate him last year. He was great in JF last year at 18 when he played fullback. He reminded me of Drinkwater with a lot he did last year "
8 minutes ago
EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Yea given his age there is time to improve his game and mould him into a 6. He definitely has the talent. He was very highly rated at Panthers HM team in 2024. He also needs to pull his head in a bit because he has a very short temper like when he…"
10 minutes ago
EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Yea Bamblett has plenty of natural strength. He is taller than Twiddle. Bamblett is quiet skinny now. As Pou said, once he builds into his frame he will be quiet strong. "
13 minutes ago
EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Miller is dominant JF because he is still very big. He needs to lose another 10-20kg. Looks like he has been losing weight as the year goes on. Let's see how he looks by the end of the year.
Nunn is only 18. He will get a game eventually in JF."
17 minutes ago
Poupou Escobar replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Surely Bamblett is young enough to learn these things EA. He is 19 years old. I remember watching him last year and I didn't rate him at all. 12 months later he is twice the player. Who knows what sort of player he'll be at 21.
If Blaize Talagi's…"
3 hours ago
Poupou Escobar replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Bamblett is very strong while Twidle isn't. When/if Bamblett fills out he could be an absolute beast."
3 hours ago
Cʜɪᴇғy Mclovin🐐 - Mark O'neill's 🪓 replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"He looks bigger than Twidle to me. Taller anyway.  His contact will improve as he gets stronger and he can use his mobility to find his place at 6.  Coaches can challenge a players defence easier than teaching that natural flair in attack.  "
4 hours ago
Joel K replied to Muttman's discussion Ponga signs a 5 year extension with Knights
"1. Ponga
6. Sharpe
7. Brown
9. Smith
That's what the Knights want to do with their spine,  not sure if that's good enough for a premiership but it will get them playing finals"
4 hours ago
Hell On Eels’s discussion was featured
Last week, the Parramatta Eels showed they can win with controlled rage and a plan.
This week, they’re up against it again. History says so. Form says so. The bookies say so. The venue says so. “Fozball” says so.
Last week’s win was fuelled by the…
4 hours ago
LB replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Then again EA, it is on the club and himself to decide what path to approach. If he and the club feel 6 can work, then work with him. He either improves enough where he gets game time or he doesn't and goes back to Fullback and hopes for an opening.…"
4 hours ago
Darren Munro replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"What about miller and nunn?"
5 hours ago
LB replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"As i said, no harm him doing it in Flegg."
5 hours ago
EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"I don't rate him at 6 because he doesn't know how to defend in the front line. His reads are horrible. He defends with his feet planted against shape which leaves his centre in two minds on whether Bamblett will get to his player or not. His contact…"
6 hours ago
EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"Well he can't even defend well in the front line against u19s sg ball so not sure how he can against JF"
6 hours ago
EA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 8 Team List v Manly Warringah Sea Eagles (Anzac Round)
"I am quiet confident Bamblett will move to fullback when Fletcher returns. Moujali and Fletcher will probably be the halves. "
6 hours ago
More…

Keaon done deal

As of Thursday, December 11, 2025, South Sydney Rabbitohs forwardKeaon Koloamatangi has reportedly agreed to a deal with the Parramatta Eels, but it is not yet officially announced by the clubs.  Soon to be announced.

Read more…
14 Replies · Reply by Poppa Jan 9
Views: 2371

 

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>