Joke of the week

Man and he wife sitting watching tv then Lady go oh my God i pain in the belly she goes again oh my God i got a pain in the belly 

Husband say to the dr there is a new dr just two house down from here go to see him and tell them you in pain

So she does then about half hour later she come back slammed the door and throws her self down

And her husband say did you get bad news

She said NO i didnt the dr told me to take off all my clothes off lay down on the table with my legs open 

He was looking between my legs and said gee that looks nice i like to full that up with ice-cream and lick it all up so i jumped up and got dressed come home

The husband said.. DID HE SAY THAT THE DIRTY CUNT WILL IM GOING TO SEE HIM ABOUT THAT

as he walk to the door he stop and thinking for a sec and then he walk back and sat down next to hes wife she looked at at him and said

I throught you were going to see the dr

The husband said ye i was but any man can eat that much ice-cream is to big for me

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • This reply was deleted.
    • I love that joke. I have been saying for 20 years it never got popular but always gets a laugh.

  • Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

    "Grandma, that sounds easy but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?

    “What... You're coming empty handed

    • The worst joke I've ever heard 

      • You needed to understand Arnie Colin, Arnie was slightly challenged but had a wonderful self depracating sense of humour, a bit like Wiz asking his wife for an extra 50 under the curtain in the massage parlour......true story!

        • O K poppa but still the worst joke .one of the best I thought was the bloke not wanting to go in the army and got under what he thought was the nuns dress .

          • Yes, forgot about that one!.....Arnie probably does not have classic's as much as being so bad that you cannot help but laugh! Lol

      • maybe something to your taste Colin

        10892673675?profile=RESIZE_584x

        • 10892673495?profile=RESIZE_710x

  • https://youtube.com/shorts/w7Q5x6W0VVg?feature=share

    There's a million of these ...

     

     

  • This is one of my all time favourites 

     

     Danny cannot make his wife orgasm, so he goes to the doctor for some advice...

    He goes to the doctor and says, "Look, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm in bed, it's a real problem."

    The doctor says, "Well, is it too warm?"

    "Yes, it's absolutely sweltering"

    "Then get an air conditioner"

    "I can't afford air conditioner doc, I'm too poor"

    "Well, Danny, do you have a good friend, I mean a real close friend?"

    "Yeah, I've got a close friend, Frank"

    "Well, ask your friend Frank to stand over you and your wife with a towel, wafting you both to cool you down, that might help."

    So, Danny asks Frank for this favor, who then agrees to help him. That night, Danny is in bed with his wife, pounding away with Frank fanning them with the towel but it's doing nothing for her.

    Danny says, "Well this isn't working, let's swap." So Danny takes the towel and starts wafting Frank, who is now making love to Danny's wife. Not long after, Danny's wife goes "Oooh... oh that's it, I'm about to cum, I'm going to cum!" And has the biggest squirt you've ever seen. 

    Frank and Danny's wife both look awkwardly at Danny , then a after a uncomfortable silence ,

    Danny shouts, triumphantly, "You see, Frank?! That's how you waft a fucking towel!"

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

Randy Handlinger replied to Roy tannous's discussion What is it?
"Blue and Gold rope"
16 minutes ago
Randy Handlinger replied to CarloEEL2's discussion Show of hands
"from foxsports...Shane Richardson declaring to the AFR last year: “Las Vegas was a f***ing disaster and it was a party trip for everybody....that's junket talk"
23 minutes ago
ParramAddict replied to Roy tannous's discussion What is it?
"starting to think their has been a massive inflation in costs for dye used on clothing, seriously or gear is just dull, hopefully when we get a new supplier things change ..... especially getting the colours back in the logo on fan and training gear…"
32 minutes ago
Titan replied to Roy tannous's discussion What is it?
"Wow just wow. Tomorrow's major announcement will be vintage socks people"
34 minutes ago
Perpetual Motion replied to LB's discussion Parramatta Eels selection questions for 2026: Changing plans, outside backs and new signings
"Maybe because its a footy forum...... just speculating."
1 hour ago
Blue Eel replied to Roy tannous's discussion What is it?
"And the big news is .... Captains run T Shirts now available. "
1 hour ago
The Badger replied to LB's discussion Parramatta Eels selection questions for 2026: Changing plans, outside backs and new signings
"This is spot on Daz, and why we are saying we require fair and comparable compensation for Lomax from any NRL club he wishes to join."
1 hour ago
The Badger replied to EA's discussion EA & SB Rookie Report - SG Ball Watchlist
"Thanks for this EA. I think we all are hoping these guys transition into good FG players at the earliest opportunity. "
1 hour ago
Prof. Daz replied to LB's discussion Parramatta Eels selection questions for 2026: Changing plans, outside backs and new signings
"Most concerning for me is that the Eels appear to be two long-term injuries away from running on fumes in the outside backs. There is a set stock vying for the backline, of Iongi/Papalii FB; JAC, Simonsson, Russel & Kelly for wing; and centre being…"
1 hour ago
Randy Handlinger replied to CarloEEL2's discussion Show of hands
"Timothy Snyder today on the Ethnic Cleansing coming to Ohio"
2 hours ago
Prof. Daz replied to CarloEEL2's discussion Show of hands
"Poppa, if we applied The Orange Test to this situation, to go to Vegas or not to go to Vegas, it would be the following. I don't want to go to the USA, which therefore excludes Vegas by logic even for MAGA. If some want to go and are thus dissenting…"
2 hours ago
EA replied to LB's discussion Parramatta Eels selection questions for 2026: Changing plans, outside backs and new signings
"Not sure why they are uncertain on Coinakis best position. He is an out and out dummy half to me. Perhaps they do not believe he has the upside to overtake Da Silva and Smith.
They even got Riley Davis and Talen Risati (if he chooses league over…"
2 hours ago
EA replied to LB's discussion Parramatta Eels selection questions for 2026: Changing plans, outside backs and new signings
"Lorenzo's upside as a 6 is easily better than Fletcher."
2 hours ago
Prof. Daz replied to CarloEEL2's discussion Show of hands
"Irony, Perpetual M, is as dead as a democratic critic of Trump"
2 hours ago
Prof. Daz replied to CarloEEL2's discussion Show of hands
"Macy, I was reading the other day an Atlantic article about a previous darling of the US conservative political class (politicians, TV pundits inc Fox, influencers etc), who was a militia leader and who had engaged in several armed standoffs with…"
2 hours ago
EA replied to EA's discussion EA & SB Rookie Report - SG Ball Watchlist
"This forward pack is so elite and is spoilt for choices. There is going to be a couple of disappointed players every week because there are more than 17 good players."
2 hours ago
More…

Keaon done deal

As of Thursday, December 11, 2025, South Sydney Rabbitohs forwardKeaon Koloamatangi has reportedly agreed to a deal with the Parramatta Eels, but it is not yet officially announced by the clubs.  Soon to be announced.

Read more…
14 Replies · Reply by Poppa Jan 9
Views: 2013

ANY MORE SIGNINGS???

I've been frustrated recently about the work we have been doing in the open market. Jonah's alright for a year and JDB is solid but he's getting old. I feel we need more in the forwards and some a replacement outside back. All I have seen is links…

Read more…
0 Replies
Views: 291

 

Show of hands

  Who wants to go to Vegas in 2027 ? Not me !!! Do we really need that side of marketing for our club ???? Can't we just focus on playing good footy week in and out and having well prepared and rested players .  we already have a strong base , we…

Read more…
94 Replies · Reply by Randy Handlinger 23 minutes ago
Views: 1258

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>