Joke of the week

Man and he wife sitting watching tv then Lady go oh my God i pain in the belly she goes again oh my God i got a pain in the belly 

Husband say to the dr there is a new dr just two house down from here go to see him and tell them you in pain

So she does then about half hour later she come back slammed the door and throws her self down

And her husband say did you get bad news

She said NO i didnt the dr told me to take off all my clothes off lay down on the table with my legs open 

He was looking between my legs and said gee that looks nice i like to full that up with ice-cream and lick it all up so i jumped up and got dressed come home

The husband said.. DID HE SAY THAT THE DIRTY CUNT WILL IM GOING TO SEE HIM ABOUT THAT

as he walk to the door he stop and thinking for a sec and then he walk back and sat down next to hes wife she looked at at him and said

I throught you were going to see the dr

The husband said ye i was but any man can eat that much ice-cream is to big for me

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • This reply was deleted.
    • I love that joke. I have been saying for 20 years it never got popular but always gets a laugh.

  • Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

    "Grandma, that sounds easy but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?

    “What... You're coming empty handed

    • The worst joke I've ever heard 

      • You needed to understand Arnie Colin, Arnie was slightly challenged but had a wonderful self depracating sense of humour, a bit like Wiz asking his wife for an extra 50 under the curtain in the massage parlour......true story!

        • O K poppa but still the worst joke .one of the best I thought was the bloke not wanting to go in the army and got under what he thought was the nuns dress .

          • Yes, forgot about that one!.....Arnie probably does not have classic's as much as being so bad that you cannot help but laugh! Lol

      • maybe something to your taste Colin

        10892673675?profile=RESIZE_584x

        • 10892673495?profile=RESIZE_710x

  • https://youtube.com/shorts/w7Q5x6W0VVg?feature=share

    There's a million of these ...

     

     

  • This is one of my all time favourites 

     

     Danny cannot make his wife orgasm, so he goes to the doctor for some advice...

    He goes to the doctor and says, "Look, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm in bed, it's a real problem."

    The doctor says, "Well, is it too warm?"

    "Yes, it's absolutely sweltering"

    "Then get an air conditioner"

    "I can't afford air conditioner doc, I'm too poor"

    "Well, Danny, do you have a good friend, I mean a real close friend?"

    "Yeah, I've got a close friend, Frank"

    "Well, ask your friend Frank to stand over you and your wife with a towel, wafting you both to cool you down, that might help."

    So, Danny asks Frank for this favor, who then agrees to help him. That night, Danny is in bed with his wife, pounding away with Frank fanning them with the towel but it's doing nothing for her.

    Danny says, "Well this isn't working, let's swap." So Danny takes the towel and starts wafting Frank, who is now making love to Danny's wife. Not long after, Danny's wife goes "Oooh... oh that's it, I'm about to cum, I'm going to cum!" And has the biggest squirt you've ever seen. 

    Frank and Danny's wife both look awkwardly at Danny , then a after a uncomfortable silence ,

    Danny shouts, triumphantly, "You see, Frank?! That's how you waft a fucking towel!"

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

EA replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"to me our top 5 juniors that we have that haven't played nrl yet is Lorenzo (20), Petrus (19), Koina (19), Seuseu (16) and Popo (20). Popo hasn't played much this year due to injury but last years form puts him on this list for me. Could argue the…"
1 hour ago
Kurupt - Your Mums Favourite Thug replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"I'm getting word out of Mexico that Loko is crazy."
2 hours ago
Yeah Man replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"Is Ryda, Petrus and Fletcher the best juniors we have?
 "
2 hours ago
LB replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"If it was possible to do why haven't other rubbish teams done so? It sounds simple in theory but it just isn't and what it will take to get Yeo and Cleary here would destroy our cap. Added to that Yeo is 33 next year, how long til he declines?"
2 hours ago
EA replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"Pryke is the 7th player from the 2023 SG ball winning team to make their NRL debut. Alamadine and Vaivea were the wingers in that team and they are in nsw cup. TBH i dont either are NRL quality. Lynn and De Stradis are playing Qcup.
So essentially…"
2 hours ago
EA replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"We have good juniors coming through for sure. The next wave starting with Lorenzo should start playing more NRL from next year. Then Petrus, Koina, Popo and others should follow"
2 hours ago
KENDOZA replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 7 Team List v Canterbury-Bankstown Bulldogs
"They won't"
2 hours ago
Yeah Man replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"Is talk of our juniors being good just talk or do we have at least something to look forward to."
3 hours ago
Parrafan101 replied to Yeah Man's discussion Worst forward pack ever in team history?
"That has to be the most scariest thing to happen, but could pivot so much in growth of our younger guys. Everything happens for a reason. "
3 hours ago
Parrafan101 replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"These are players we need, they are culture driven players. I'll sign watson as well, add Tago to our side as well. Winners and Heart thats what this club needs to be built on. If im Ryles ill go all in to sign Yeo or Cleary, you've got to do it for…"
3 hours ago
Joel K replied to Yeah Man's discussion Worst forward pack ever in team history?
"Smith is playing injured and we don't have anybody in cup to give him a rest"
3 hours ago
Parrafan101 replied to Roy tannous's discussion We’re gonna get bent over
"Can't see us win this, in order to win they need to play simple basic footy with a bit of defence. But we aren't willing to grind games down like we did in 2019-22. Ryles coaching is making these boys play to chaotic, when everyone should know what…"
4 hours ago
Yehez replied to Roy tannous's discussion We’re gonna get bent over
"What if we win tho"
4 hours ago
LB replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"I would argue you still do need experience, but I also have said we could do with two middles."
4 hours ago
Joel K replied to EA's discussion Loko Pasifiki Tonga requests immediate release
"We wouldn't need an established prop if we get him as he is first grade ready but I've only seen Titans and Bulldogs linked to him"
4 hours ago
HH - Love You Iongi Time! replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 7 Team List v Canterbury-Bankstown Bulldogs
"There are too many variables to consider all up. The only constant being opportunity. Lorenzo, in all seriousness, may not be ready round 1 next year. The continual imbalance of rosters between FG and Cup due to injury could hinder his progress all…"
4 hours ago
More…

Keaon done deal

As of Thursday, December 11, 2025, South Sydney Rabbitohs forwardKeaon Koloamatangi has reportedly agreed to a deal with the Parramatta Eels, but it is not yet officially announced by the clubs.  Soon to be announced.

Read more…
14 Replies · Reply by Poppa Jan 9
Views: 2323

 

Injury Report

Hopgood - ACL - SeasonMatt Doorey - ACL - SeasonBailey Simonsson - Ankle - TBC (I would say season)Isaiah Iongi - Syndesmosis - rd 13Jonah Pezet - Hamstring - rd 13Apa Twiddle - AC Joint - rd 15Jordan Samrani - Knee - rd 13Richard Pensini - knee -…

Read more…
2 Replies · Reply by Eels95 9 hours ago
Views: 248

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>