Joke of the week

Man and he wife sitting watching tv then Lady go oh my God i pain in the belly she goes again oh my God i got a pain in the belly 

Husband say to the dr there is a new dr just two house down from here go to see him and tell them you in pain

So she does then about half hour later she come back slammed the door and throws her self down

And her husband say did you get bad news

She said NO i didnt the dr told me to take off all my clothes off lay down on the table with my legs open 

He was looking between my legs and said gee that looks nice i like to full that up with ice-cream and lick it all up so i jumped up and got dressed come home

The husband said.. DID HE SAY THAT THE DIRTY CUNT WILL IM GOING TO SEE HIM ABOUT THAT

as he walk to the door he stop and thinking for a sec and then he walk back and sat down next to hes wife she looked at at him and said

I throught you were going to see the dr

The husband said ye i was but any man can eat that much ice-cream is to big for me

You need to be a member of 1Eyed Eel to add comments!

Join 1Eyed Eel

Votes: 0
Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • This reply was deleted.
    • I love that joke. I have been saying for 20 years it never got popular but always gets a laugh.

  • Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."

    "Grandma, that sounds easy but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?

    “What... You're coming empty handed

    • The worst joke I've ever heard 

      • You needed to understand Arnie Colin, Arnie was slightly challenged but had a wonderful self depracating sense of humour, a bit like Wiz asking his wife for an extra 50 under the curtain in the massage parlour......true story!

        • O K poppa but still the worst joke .one of the best I thought was the bloke not wanting to go in the army and got under what he thought was the nuns dress .

          • Yes, forgot about that one!.....Arnie probably does not have classic's as much as being so bad that you cannot help but laugh! Lol

      • maybe something to your taste Colin

        10892673675?profile=RESIZE_584x

        • 10892673495?profile=RESIZE_710x

  • https://youtube.com/shorts/w7Q5x6W0VVg?feature=share

    There's a million of these ...

     

     

  • This is one of my all time favourites 

     

     Danny cannot make his wife orgasm, so he goes to the doctor for some advice...

    He goes to the doctor and says, "Look, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm in bed, it's a real problem."

    The doctor says, "Well, is it too warm?"

    "Yes, it's absolutely sweltering"

    "Then get an air conditioner"

    "I can't afford air conditioner doc, I'm too poor"

    "Well, Danny, do you have a good friend, I mean a real close friend?"

    "Yeah, I've got a close friend, Frank"

    "Well, ask your friend Frank to stand over you and your wife with a towel, wafting you both to cool you down, that might help."

    So, Danny asks Frank for this favor, who then agrees to help him. That night, Danny is in bed with his wife, pounding away with Frank fanning them with the towel but it's doing nothing for her.

    Danny says, "Well this isn't working, let's swap." So Danny takes the towel and starts wafting Frank, who is now making love to Danny's wife. Not long after, Danny's wife goes "Oooh... oh that's it, I'm about to cum, I'm going to cum!" And has the biggest squirt you've ever seen. 

    Frank and Danny's wife both look awkwardly at Danny , then a after a uncomfortable silence ,

    Danny shouts, triumphantly, "You see, Frank?! That's how you waft a fucking towel!"

This reply was deleted.

Latest comments

Parrafan101 replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"I have a sneaky feeling tago might come to parra."
45 minutes ago
LB replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"I guess, if someone like Penisini or Nanva can kick on then even better but at this stage once one of the backline go down, the next man up goes in but after them?
But also if Warriors accept that for Barnett then it's crazy how they'll accept. A…"
1 hour ago
LB replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"De Belin has an option for 2027, it would surprise me if we get Barnett that we keep JBD if he is just ok this year. I mean if you are giving an option in our favour you have some concerns somewhere in his games or with his age.
Though we show more…"
1 hour ago
Parraborn1 replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"I don't know if you agree with me, disagree with me or are insulting me, but sure. That was a difficult read."
1 hour ago
LB replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"Well if you are referring to me Pops, you would see I said Samrani as a depth player is crucial due to what we have. I also said if we signed say Tago then I would be fine letting him go.
But yeah some here are saying he is a gun, when I feel he is…"
1 hour ago
LB replied to LB's discussion 1eE Modern day Eels team: Bench Props
"True."
1 hour ago
LB replied to LB's discussion 1eE Modern day Eels team: Bench Props
"Mannah didn't get a single vote in the first round for Props. I agree, he is undervalued. He was just around at the wrong time for us as he was there for 3 spoons and the non finals years."
1 hour ago
Poppa replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 2 Team List v Brisbane Broncos
"injured or Menopause.....you are obviously quiet young Mallee......do you realise what a menopausal woman could do to you as she "ripped" you apart.......Carlo and Mace, explain if we had a team of menopausal women, we wouldn't lose a game.....lots…"
1 hour ago
Poppa replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 2 Team List v Brisbane Broncos
"Did he let him go, or was he made an offer too good to refuse.....6 months ago you would have been applauding.......it would have been a committee meeting, not a single person decision.
If we are desperate to keep him and he he wants to stay..... a…"
1 hour ago
Poppa replied to ParramattaLurker's discussion Round 2 Team List v Brisbane Broncos
"I hate to say it BEM, but I am coming around to your thinking somewhat....mind you have no problem with JDB.
Russell has been moved into the centres, I hope he stays there, if JAC drops out.
If we do cop another hiding (well on the cards) I hope he…"
1 hour ago
Poppa replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"Parraborn1
I happen to agree with your inference, I have aleady posted that it would be most unlike Parra to discuss such tactics in public. The journalist's seek out people like you who get taken, not for the right reasons, but because you can…"
1 hour ago
Poppa replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"Trouble is you guys get carried away with "flashy one offs" you don't like looking outside the box, to see what else we have or need. 
Samrani is promissing and has potential, but he is not going to be a destructive forward and more than likely a…"
2 hours ago
Adam Magrath replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"That's a bad idea on so many levels, I doubt there is much truth to this at all."
2 hours ago
Poppa replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"Geez you have made some early season assumptions, De Belin likely to go, Titans lose a game, they are not going so well.....what about the Eels LB, how are they going?
Lot of cooks pissing into this broth!......this deal with Barnett, have you ever…"
2 hours ago
Jack replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"I don't mind giving samarni but I just don't think Barrett is worth 820. Not sure we wouldn't just offer Kolo that extra year or may that money at the time "
2 hours ago
parra supporter replied to Roy tannous's discussion Eels offering Jordan samrani
"Yep no jbd and no paulo try to extend walker "
3 hours ago
More…

Keaon done deal

As of Thursday, December 11, 2025, South Sydney Rabbitohs forwardKeaon Koloamatangi has reportedly agreed to a deal with the Parramatta Eels, but it is not yet officially announced by the clubs.  Soon to be announced.

Read more…
14 Replies · Reply by Poppa Jan 9
Views: 2186

 

1eE Modern day Eels team: Bench Props

Dylan Walker narrowly edged out Daniel Wagon for the Utility spot.Now onto Bench Props where the best two will get on the bench.https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/PSSXZSS 1. Hayne2. Burt3. Lyon4. Tahu5. Radradra6. Brown7. Moses8. Cayless9. Marsh10.…

Read more…
8 Replies · Reply by LB 1 hour ago
Views: 245

<script src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script>
<!-- Sidebar -->
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<script>// <![CDATA[
(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});
// ]]></script>