Manu Ma'u Facts

Fear of spiders is arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, fear of Manu Ma’u is called logic.

There used to be a street in New Zealand named after Manu Ma’u, but it was changed because nobody crosses Manu Ma’u and lives.

JC can walk on water; Manu Ma’u can swim through land.

Manu Ma’u and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

Manu Ma’u has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afraid to move.

Manu Ma’u doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the sh*t out of it

Death once had a near- Manu Ma’u experience

Manu Ma’u can slam a revolving door.

The word " Manu Ma’u " was added to the dictionary but then was taken off, because no-one searches for Manu Ma’u, Manu Ma’u searches for you

There is a monster under your bed hiding from Manu Ma’u.

Manu Ma’u will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Manu Ma’u doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

Manu Ma’u once got bit by a Death Adder........ After three days of pain and agony ..................the Death Adder died.

When Manu Ma’u does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Manu Ma’u allows to live.

Manu Ma’u doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.

The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Manu Ma’u. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.

Manu Ma’u doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Manu Ma’u is the 2nd leading cause of death world-wide after heart attacks, most of which were caused by fear of Manu Ma’u

They once made a Manu Ma’u toilet paper, but there was a problem: It wouldn't take shit from anybody.

Manu Ma’u's tears cure cancer ..... too bad he has never cried

Manu Ma’u was dropped twice as a baby. First on Hiroshima, then on Nagasaki.

People sell their souls to the devil. The devil sells his soul to Manu Ma’u.

The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Manu Ma’u is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.

Manu Ma’u jumped off a building once. The ground didn't make it..

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Replies

  • All of the above is true

  • But you forgot that Chuck Norris checks his closet every night before he goes to bed to make sure I'm not hiding there

  • Good work Wile E. Coyote

    Wile E. Coyote's Page
    Wile E. Coyote's Page on 1Eyed Eel
  • The man-crush is strong with this post.I can sense it.

  • Manu can slam a revolving door
  • Manu so tough he wear life be in it t shirt to funnels

    • Bahahahahaha! Way to butcher a joke, Paulie!!
    • Just deciphered it Paul,brilliant.

    • I'm calling George Smilovici, Paul and he's going to kick your arse for ruining his 30-year old jokes.
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