So now I'm screwed. For weeks, I've been working on a gameplan that I believe would revolutionise the way League was played, but now I'm going to have to bin it.
Ah, the joys of being an NRL coach.
The strategy came to me not long after watching Germany beat Australia four to nil in the World Cup. Hey, they seem to find it pretty easy to score, I thought. So next training session, we took the round ball out.
Surprisingly enough, the boys were pretty bloody good. Jarryd especially so. Joels' brother plays A-League, so I thought let's think about this. What's been stuffing up, of late. Too much dropped ball for one. So let's work with that. How about if we don't ever pick the ball up and instead just kick it around. No chance of ever knocking the ball on, then. What else have we had a few problems with? Forward passes. Well, you're allowed to kick the ball forward! And finally, our halves can't thrown a face ball to save their lives. Voila. Now they don't have to!
Genius, if I don't say so myself. We've modelled our game on the Germans and after they walloped Argentina, I was feeling pretty confident that we were on the right track. I even told Jarryd that he wasn't to bother trying to catch bombs, he should just volley it across to Burty with his boot.
So what does Haynezy do last night? He tries to pull off the play for NSW. For fuck's sake, Jarryd. Clearly, Bellyache knows all about my genius plan and he hates Parramatta so much I'm sure the faxes are flying around the coaching ranks as I write this. Of course, what you would have seen if I'd had a chance to put the gameplan in place was Hayzney vollying the ball out to Burty, who would have steamed onto the ball, dribbing it ahead before cutting the ball across to the other side of the field to a flying Inu, who was to put a one touch passed back to Haynezy, who would have dived on the ball across the tryline for a try.
Unfortunately, everyone's going to be awake to it now. And plus Germany lost this morning, so maybe we should have modelled ourselves on someone else anyway.
Anyway, I think Bellamy proved what a lousy coach he is last night, by his refusal to let our Timmy have some decent gametime. Seriously, any one that gets outcoached by Mal Meninga and Michael Hagan has serious problems. At least that will be one coaching job that opens up, should the axe fall here.
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I'll go and have a re-think. Just maybe, Bellamy is too stupid to have twigged to what was going on, anyway.
Relax FDA - tv flashed to Bellamy when Haynezy kicked that ball and Bellyache was screaming "wtf does he think he's doing?" so he hasn't twigged to that play at all.
In fact bells hasn't twigged to anything the Blues did.
Just make sure the guys don't watch the Uraguay teams "hand of god" move or it might come unstuck tho.
The other thing in your favour is that no other team supporters (except SBBB) come on this site so your secrets will always be safe here.
Bellamy did you a favour by keeping Timmy fresh for Monday night and only pulled him because he was smashing Cam Smith too hard and too often.
Keep up the good work man.
Tony on the Bongos with all the female supporters dancing naked around a burning granstand.
The swarm madly waving banners and chanting. "PARRA - PARRA"
OOPS - Sorry - we did that in the 80's - didn't we?
FDA where are you? - we need you