You come from dust and to dust you will return. That's why you shouldn't dust. It could be someone you know.
When one door closes and another door opens, you're probably in prison.
If you answer your phone with "Hello. You're on the air.", most telemarketers will quickly hang up.Sometimes, someone unexpected comes into your life from nowhere. It makes your heart race and changes you forever. We call these people cops.
For Sale . Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
They say marriages are made in Heaven. Then again, so is lightning and thunder.
Maybe the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of Charades.
This "killing them with kindness" is taking way longer than I expected.
I started out with nothing. I still have most of it.
There's nothing scarier than that split second when you lose your balance in the shower and think "Oh No. They're gonna find me naked.”
One minute you're young and fun. And the next you're turning down the stereo in your car so you can see better.
One day you'll be able to tell your grandkids that you survived the GTPS 2020 (Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020).
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
And finally - Can we all agree that in 2015 not a single person got the answer correct to the question, "Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?"
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Slugg is not here yet. Maybe got it wrong .North pole?
Today, I went down to the local Gun shop to get a shot gun and ammo to do a little birding. When I was ready to pay, the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me."
Making a mental note to complain to the police about gun control Nazi's running amok making up crazy rules, I did just as she instructed.
When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I discovered that she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card reader!
As a senior citizen, I do not get flustered often, but this time it took me a while to get my pants back on. I've been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.
They need to make their instructions to seniors a little more clear. I still don't think I looked that bad! I just need to wear underwear more often.
Be aware boys, be really aware. Things don't get easier at our age.
Haha with a plus
How to cut all your bills inn half.
lol Sir Col
My mostest favourite comedian
The PRESENCE of loved famly and friends is far more valuable than their presents.
Deep or what?
Very deep . . and highly debatable ;)
We do very silly stuff at Xmas Sir Col- Opening presents at Christmas time often results for looking for receipts so that they can be exchanged for another color, another model etc. So we exchange envelopes around and often come out square.I agree the hugs and good will is what it should be all about. You do all that after the dishes are washed and accept no exit excuses.